Wednesday, July 14, 2004

Hay Life....

Here I am trying to be the less jealous girlfriend. I used to be a jealous girlfriend. Well.. I still am, but I'm trying to fight it. When I think about it, it all stems to possessiveness and selfishness. I want my boyfriend all to myself. I don't want him talking or having fun with other girls. I also think that it's also because he's a also jealous boyfriend. When our relationship was still on its first year, I wasn't allowed to text guys or be with guys. It was always an issue. So, I think I also got it from him. He may not be that jealous now... but I think it's also because I don't give him any reason to be. I am so aloof with guys; I don't talk to guys; I don't hang out with guys; I don't interact with them. And whenever a guy tries to talk to me or something, I get this scared feeling and start thinking of ways to shoo him or end the conversation. I just want peace. And I want him to do the same. I know it's not healthy and that's the reason why I am trying to change. But it's hard.. really.. Especially if I still stop myself from having guy friends. *sigh*

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